Sitting here in the cloud of new mother-hood, I’m overwhelmed by the paradox: the feelings of awe and disbelief mixed with a feeling of “extreme-rightness.” How did this happen? Is this real or am I just dreaming? Caught in the haze, I’ll try to remember the details of this child’s amazing arrival into our world…
On Sunday October 10 in the afternoon, I felt a sensation I decided to call a contraction, though having never actually felt one before, I really had no idea. I decided to time these “contractions” and found that they were occurring incrementally closer together, but at irregular intervals. Luke cooked me a beautiful dinner and we proceeded as if nothing was happening… Well around 3am, I confirmed for myself that something was indeed happening.
In the night, around 3, these “contractions” started becoming a bit stronger and occurring at regular 10 minute intervals. I tried to doze between them, but found myself glancing at the clock more frequently than anything else. By about 6, I decided to sit up, thinking it might help things move along. It did—by 8am they were about 6-7 minutes apart. Once they reached 5 for an hour, we diligently called labor and delivery who told us, respectfully, not to come in yet. So we tried to doze more for another hour, when I reached the point of near freak-out, not knowing what was really going on in my body and desperately wanting to find out.
We arrived at Kaiser at 10:40am where the triage nurse rather roughly checked me out. She said I was only 1cm dilated and that I should go home or go walking. I said, “You’re crazy, I’m not going anywhere” (in so many words). She got the midwife to check the baby’s position and the midwife also ventured into the argument of why the 1cm dilated nervous-as-heck pregnant lady should go have lunch in downtown Walnut Creek instead of staying at the hospital. I expressed my concerns, specifically around the blood pouring out of my body since the rough exam. She changed the pad and on the next gush I said, “Geez it’s so much,” and she said:
“Actually that was your bag of waters. You’re not going anywhere.”
“WHEW. I knew I wasn’t going to leave…” This was at 11:30am.
She explained that it was still so early on that I would probably be there a long time (well into the night or next day, she was guessing). I said I didn’t care, I was just so happy to not have to decide whether to go home or wander the streets of Walnut Creek!
I was eventually checked in, but by then the contractions were much stronger. Once I got in the labor and delivery room, I sat on the birthing ball for about 20 minutes, but then I had to get in the bed and have an IV because I was Group B Strep positive. I was also on the fetal heart-rate monitor and contraction monitor. This confinement was not ideal. However I soon realized I was quite lightheaded and breathing through contractions was not helping that situation. Luke thought I probably would have stayed in the bed during that time anyways.
Time went on, Luke and Mum helped me through contractions by breathing and concentrating. I said to Mum at one point, “This really sucks. This is so hard.” She agreed or course (you never argue with a woman in labor!). I tried to think about opening and relaxing, but it was so hard because it is your body’s instinct to tighten up when there is pain. I threw up massive amounts on a couple of occasions which was a surprise to both me and Luke (who actually got barfed on, unfortunately—prep for the long haul with a baby I suppose), but not to our wise nurse (ah, the things they don’t tell you in birthing prep class!). I felt like the contractions were getting stronger and stronger and refused offers for music or a movie, like we had planned as distractions during a potentially very long first labor. I didn’t want anything but to get through each contraction.
Finally the antibiotics in the IV were done and I was allowed to get out of bed. This was around 4:15. I had mentioned to the nurse at some stage that I would like to get in the shower for pain relief. She knew and supported my desire to have a natural delivery and never pressured for meds. Luke helped me into the shower where I tried standing for a little while. I moaned through the contractions at this point, because I started feeling like my legs were going to give out on me and my insides were going to come out. I was trembling violently. After a bit I sat on the seat with a hole in the middle with the water on my back and Luke’s wonder-hands massaging. Every time I had a contraction, he would tell me I was doing great and I would sometimes say, “Oh hunny, oh hunny,” never accompanied by swear words or curses. I decided I was done and that this was ridiculous and that I needed something to stop the pain. I thought I was such a wuss and that if I was going to have as long a labor as everyone thought I would that I would need an epidural to get through the worst pain yet to come (I truly could not imagine anything worse). The nurse came in and I said I felt like I needed a bowel movement. Luke said, “Please get the midwife so she can get checked for dilation.” The lovely nurse noticed the strength of my contractions and said, “Oh those are much stronger now.” I thought, “DUH!”
Somehow I got back to the bed and the magical midwife appeared. By this time it was 5pm, 5 and a half hours after my water had broken. I had my mind set that if she told me I was only 4 or 5 centimeters that I would ask for drugs. As I writhed through the exam/contraction, the midwife said, “WOW, actually if you want to you can PUSH.” I felt such relief that I wasn’t a wuss and that this would be over sometime soon. I also felt a twinge of disappointment that I would have to feel the remainder of the delivery. So they helped me set up for pushing and Luke did exactly like we practiced—counting through each push, paced by the midwife (though I liked his fast pace better).
After every contraction, I “relaxed,” wondering how far the head was and how many more times I would have to do this pushing business. I said something like, “I want to have this baby out now please!” The nurse and midwife and Luke said reassuring things like yes she’s coming soon, and asked me if I wanted to see the head in a mirror (“NO!) or feel the top of the head (“NO!). When I was ready to push again, I would say, “OK here it comes—HELP!” And pushing commenced. I pushed for 35 minutes and finally, in 2 big consecutive pushes, out came the baby. At 5:40pm on Monday October 11, 2010, this slimy gray blob appeared on my belly and I was thinking, “No way. That did not just happen. This is not a baby.” Then I saw her face and my heart stopped. It was a tiny little slimy gray Luke! The nose, the mouth, the chin (the slime… just kidding). I was sold. Forever.
The nurse tidied her up a bit on my tummy, then asked permission to weigh and clean her up (“Yes!” I’m not a fan of slime.). I got stitched up (only a small 2nd degree tear) and chatted with the midwife about the delivery. Both the midwife and the nurse said my type of delivery, as in, first, natural, and that fast, was 1 in 100, or even once per year and that it was amazing for them to be part of. They said I was amazing. I didn’t think so at the time because I felt pretty ragged, but coming from professionals, it was a huge compliment. The nurse also said I was quiet—that I argued with. I felt like I was screaming at the end of each push! I must have been because I was a bit hoarse the next day. Still, compared to others giving natural birth, apparently I did just fine.
We named the baby Adelaide Judith after the city in Australia where Luke and I met and after my dear mother. There was no other name on our minds when we met her! Her nickname will be Addy, in case she ever lives in Adelaide (but she will be a proud Crows supporter either way of course).
Overall, from the time I was assessed to be only 1cm to the point where I was in transition and ready to push was a mere 6 hours. Though my very early labor lasted a while, the progress and speed in the hospital was revered by all the staff who heard the story. I think I left an impression there (I wouldn’t have it any other way).
After 2 nights with Adelaide in the hospital (because she was born in the evening they let me stay an extra night—yay!), we made our journey home.
And now the real adventure begins…
On Sunday October 10 in the afternoon, I felt a sensation I decided to call a contraction, though having never actually felt one before, I really had no idea. I decided to time these “contractions” and found that they were occurring incrementally closer together, but at irregular intervals. Luke cooked me a beautiful dinner and we proceeded as if nothing was happening… Well around 3am, I confirmed for myself that something was indeed happening.
In the night, around 3, these “contractions” started becoming a bit stronger and occurring at regular 10 minute intervals. I tried to doze between them, but found myself glancing at the clock more frequently than anything else. By about 6, I decided to sit up, thinking it might help things move along. It did—by 8am they were about 6-7 minutes apart. Once they reached 5 for an hour, we diligently called labor and delivery who told us, respectfully, not to come in yet. So we tried to doze more for another hour, when I reached the point of near freak-out, not knowing what was really going on in my body and desperately wanting to find out.
We arrived at Kaiser at 10:40am where the triage nurse rather roughly checked me out. She said I was only 1cm dilated and that I should go home or go walking. I said, “You’re crazy, I’m not going anywhere” (in so many words). She got the midwife to check the baby’s position and the midwife also ventured into the argument of why the 1cm dilated nervous-as-heck pregnant lady should go have lunch in downtown Walnut Creek instead of staying at the hospital. I expressed my concerns, specifically around the blood pouring out of my body since the rough exam. She changed the pad and on the next gush I said, “Geez it’s so much,” and she said:
“Actually that was your bag of waters. You’re not going anywhere.”
“WHEW. I knew I wasn’t going to leave…” This was at 11:30am.
She explained that it was still so early on that I would probably be there a long time (well into the night or next day, she was guessing). I said I didn’t care, I was just so happy to not have to decide whether to go home or wander the streets of Walnut Creek!
I was eventually checked in, but by then the contractions were much stronger. Once I got in the labor and delivery room, I sat on the birthing ball for about 20 minutes, but then I had to get in the bed and have an IV because I was Group B Strep positive. I was also on the fetal heart-rate monitor and contraction monitor. This confinement was not ideal. However I soon realized I was quite lightheaded and breathing through contractions was not helping that situation. Luke thought I probably would have stayed in the bed during that time anyways.
Time went on, Luke and Mum helped me through contractions by breathing and concentrating. I said to Mum at one point, “This really sucks. This is so hard.” She agreed or course (you never argue with a woman in labor!). I tried to think about opening and relaxing, but it was so hard because it is your body’s instinct to tighten up when there is pain. I threw up massive amounts on a couple of occasions which was a surprise to both me and Luke (who actually got barfed on, unfortunately—prep for the long haul with a baby I suppose), but not to our wise nurse (ah, the things they don’t tell you in birthing prep class!). I felt like the contractions were getting stronger and stronger and refused offers for music or a movie, like we had planned as distractions during a potentially very long first labor. I didn’t want anything but to get through each contraction.
Finally the antibiotics in the IV were done and I was allowed to get out of bed. This was around 4:15. I had mentioned to the nurse at some stage that I would like to get in the shower for pain relief. She knew and supported my desire to have a natural delivery and never pressured for meds. Luke helped me into the shower where I tried standing for a little while. I moaned through the contractions at this point, because I started feeling like my legs were going to give out on me and my insides were going to come out. I was trembling violently. After a bit I sat on the seat with a hole in the middle with the water on my back and Luke’s wonder-hands massaging. Every time I had a contraction, he would tell me I was doing great and I would sometimes say, “Oh hunny, oh hunny,” never accompanied by swear words or curses. I decided I was done and that this was ridiculous and that I needed something to stop the pain. I thought I was such a wuss and that if I was going to have as long a labor as everyone thought I would that I would need an epidural to get through the worst pain yet to come (I truly could not imagine anything worse). The nurse came in and I said I felt like I needed a bowel movement. Luke said, “Please get the midwife so she can get checked for dilation.” The lovely nurse noticed the strength of my contractions and said, “Oh those are much stronger now.” I thought, “DUH!”
Somehow I got back to the bed and the magical midwife appeared. By this time it was 5pm, 5 and a half hours after my water had broken. I had my mind set that if she told me I was only 4 or 5 centimeters that I would ask for drugs. As I writhed through the exam/contraction, the midwife said, “WOW, actually if you want to you can PUSH.” I felt such relief that I wasn’t a wuss and that this would be over sometime soon. I also felt a twinge of disappointment that I would have to feel the remainder of the delivery. So they helped me set up for pushing and Luke did exactly like we practiced—counting through each push, paced by the midwife (though I liked his fast pace better).
After every contraction, I “relaxed,” wondering how far the head was and how many more times I would have to do this pushing business. I said something like, “I want to have this baby out now please!” The nurse and midwife and Luke said reassuring things like yes she’s coming soon, and asked me if I wanted to see the head in a mirror (“NO!) or feel the top of the head (“NO!). When I was ready to push again, I would say, “OK here it comes—HELP!” And pushing commenced. I pushed for 35 minutes and finally, in 2 big consecutive pushes, out came the baby. At 5:40pm on Monday October 11, 2010, this slimy gray blob appeared on my belly and I was thinking, “No way. That did not just happen. This is not a baby.” Then I saw her face and my heart stopped. It was a tiny little slimy gray Luke! The nose, the mouth, the chin (the slime… just kidding). I was sold. Forever.
The nurse tidied her up a bit on my tummy, then asked permission to weigh and clean her up (“Yes!” I’m not a fan of slime.). I got stitched up (only a small 2nd degree tear) and chatted with the midwife about the delivery. Both the midwife and the nurse said my type of delivery, as in, first, natural, and that fast, was 1 in 100, or even once per year and that it was amazing for them to be part of. They said I was amazing. I didn’t think so at the time because I felt pretty ragged, but coming from professionals, it was a huge compliment. The nurse also said I was quiet—that I argued with. I felt like I was screaming at the end of each push! I must have been because I was a bit hoarse the next day. Still, compared to others giving natural birth, apparently I did just fine.
We named the baby Adelaide Judith after the city in Australia where Luke and I met and after my dear mother. There was no other name on our minds when we met her! Her nickname will be Addy, in case she ever lives in Adelaide (but she will be a proud Crows supporter either way of course).
Overall, from the time I was assessed to be only 1cm to the point where I was in transition and ready to push was a mere 6 hours. Though my very early labor lasted a while, the progress and speed in the hospital was revered by all the staff who heard the story. I think I left an impression there (I wouldn’t have it any other way).
After 2 nights with Adelaide in the hospital (because she was born in the evening they let me stay an extra night—yay!), we made our journey home.
And now the real adventure begins…
